Lickety Split Cleaning Service

my favourite phrase to say out loud (because i had said it in my mind SOoo too many times)

2012-01-02T16:10:00.000-08:00

"FUCK A DUCK!!" i say it whenever i want. Sometimes i literally mean it, as in
"Go fuck a duck if you've got nothin' better to do than BUG the fuck out of me right now!!!!!" the other day i was walking the streets downtown with a neck ache...i had tilted my head back tryin' to massage the pain and right when i tilted my head forward, i totally blurted it Out and into a holiday shopper's face..Fuck a duck! Poor guy, i think i scared him.

i been itching to write something verrrry delicately....a note to a deadman

2011-12-29T17:33:00.000-08:00

on Facebook! wtf but here it is...i didn't post it there at first because i got weirded out by myself remembering my favourite college professor (which is why it's over-edited cuz i always wanted to impress him)Sooo fondly lovingly emotional Sappily...my explanation is that i'm still raw over this and i Always get fucken buyer's remorse!!

Dear Joel,
so i Totally CHOPPED my son's hair off...not me, personally (it was the witchy woman at Supercuts w/super straight bottle black hair, the non-smiler as she sheared it off) Joel! i Really really liked his long hair!
@4am i was sleepless w/Recriminations - sad! i was beating myself up remembering all those scenes in all those damn movies set in the goddam 60's - 19yr old loveflowerchild getting beautiful locks Shorn in the army barber's chair. i fell asleep to my son's big eyes filling up w/salty tears - telling me his hair had kept him Warm! ugh! i was crying, too & i know that's silly but i was feeling mighty bad about it when There you were! you popped up in my worrywart mother's mind w/that Buzz Cut you sported the 2nd yr i ever knew you...that haircut was so cute! all spritely! it made you look.. different/younger.. somehow; wilder. You came to me but not in a dream only better. Thanx old favourite writing teacher of mine.

Love,
ChangaPeluda

Fuck You, Santa!!! (how i bloodboilingly hate the holidays!!!)

2011-12-23T14:01:00.000-08:00

so in honor of the cocksucking yuletide: some POETRY!

How Is Your Heart? by Charles Bukowski

during my worst times
on the park benches
in the jails
or living with
whores
I always had this certain
contentment-
I wouldn't call it
happiness-
it was more of an inner
balance
that settled for
whatever was occuring
and it helped in the
factories
and when relationships
went wrong
with the
girls.
it helped
through the
wars and the
hangovers
the backalley fights
the
hospitals.
to awaken in a cheap room
in a strange city and
pull up the shade-
this was the craziest kind of
contentment

and to walk across the floor
to an old dresser with a
cracked mirror-
see myself, ugly,
grinning at it all.
what matters most is
how well you
walk through the
fire.

Legally supervised babydaddy visit resulted in a sanctioned haircut

2011-12-03T08:49:00.000-08:00

but only the bangs! wtf....so i posed him as Jane Fonda getting arrested in protest

i love me some internetz tonite

2011-12-02T23:02:00.000-08:00

if ever there was a loneliness obliterater...facebook is it. fuck, i keep in touch with people i don't even know! weird!! And if you are a person that i already Love and you're on facebook: TWICE as nice. Obscure people from my past even. My own kid!! this is so awesome ( & i know, i know it's Just the internet, it's not Real [so i've heard])
G...who had dropped his page when he flew off to Heidelberg ..he just added himself back in and i couldn't be a happier mom to see his face!
the person on the monitor is my Brizz Bitch...from the apartments i used to live in. She's moving to Central California and i'm sure going to miss her...she's got Live and Let Die tatted right above her tits. I loved being this girl's neighbor. and now we get to stay friends on facebook. amazing...i hope i don't ever stop tripping out on that

2011-12-01T11:36:00.001-08:00

this shadow is totally haunting me!

2011-11-28T15:02:00.001-08:00

strange shadows on my door

2011-11-28T14:59:00.000-08:00

so this kinda scares me....it was so vivid and sad. i feel as if i captured some sort of creature with pretty eyes and a Stephen King/Dr. Suess nose.

i keep checking in

2011-11-28T09:41:00.000-08:00

to see if a certain someone has been interested in my weblog and Apparently - he doesn't give a shit.

Don't you know..they're talkin' 'bout a Revolution, son....

2011-11-21T20:10:00.000-08:00

i saw the UC Davis kids all lined up on the curb getting pepper sprayed.. defenseless - their arms locked, sitting subdued in a line....some of them had their hoodies up and that fucken cop was just strolling along emitting his poison right in their faces... i thought maybe that their hoodies might have trapped the pepper spray in. It was the reaction of their fellow students in the crowd that made me cry out in a helpless anguish. Nothing could be done to stop the senseless show of piggish power...why do cops have to be that way???

i feeeel

2011-11-18T11:34:00.000-08:00

like a fat hairy lumpy piece of shit!!!! with a hunchback & bad breath!!!

and for some reason i am enjoying myself...i may just apply for a job as a troll somewhere...is the pay good?? i bet they don't have dental.... you know that feeling when you fall down...hit the ground. don't know if you broke something and still want to laugh? that

11/11/11

2011-11-11T22:18:00.001-08:00

this is becoming my number 1 trend! yeah my #1 blog! whoooop-di-dooo!!!! hAhahaha...funny. i added a feed counter thingy and i'm the only one reading my blog...hmph. i'm miffed and fine w/that at the same time because i am now a hunchbacked recluse w/a shitty attitude anyoldhow. i severed a buncha ties with my mean family....moved outta town and now i'm kinda lonely but not really.
also: i'm not aging very well

1-1-11

2011-11-01T23:39:00.000-07:00

it's a new beginning - this late at night. i've decided to stop being such a worry wart and am blogging instead! hah! how do you like me now??

An Octopus's Foofer!!

2011-10-17T19:28:00.000-07:00

that's how fascinatingly random life in SLO county is for me & Pop-pops. Happy took us to the Monterey Bay Aquarium and we had ourselves a time. it's 2 hrs and 40 minutes from our apartment. i never did get that cupcake i was craving...i lost the kids kinda on purpose...staring at this octopus.

i love blogging

2011-10-02T16:18:00.002-07:00

that is all

Pop-pops & a girl from next door at the children's museum

2011-10-02T16:18:00.000-07:00

free moo-ahoooooooonlite hours @ the slo children's museum..

this is what i look like now: while dancing the tango (of course)

2011-10-02T16:14:00.000-07:00

omg

2011-10-02T16:09:00.000-07:00

wtF there is an option here on blogspot to "customize" and "monetize" intriguingly confusingly grody! i love my own template, aye.

i am 43 yrs old and hadn't really "felt" Frida before! and i'm a latina! wtf?!?

2011-08-30T20:47:00.001-07:00

2011-08-17T10:18:00.001-07:00

awww my pearly girl...

the brizz kids! headed to busk @ farmers

2011-08-16T15:26:00.000-07:00

so thursday farmer's market in SLO is pretty bomb. street vendors and jumping houses, music, BBQ....they close off like 5 or 6 blocks downtown...it's a little too crowded sometimes but these Brizz Kids are good at pretending i'm the momma quail and follow along in an orderly line. They got it in their heads that they wanted to make a little extra cash by singin' on one of the street corners...only when we got there - they were too quiet /shy and Pop-pops who is the lead singer..decided he'd rather climb the tree on the corner...i put 5 bucks in their hat and we got kettle corn. i call that pretty successful.

Today i miss Zoe and my De La Soul cassette tape that i WORE Out. Random but true

2011-08-16T10:17:00.000-07:00

That ole dog of mine was The Best White German Shepherd in all of Germany and the world. Speaking of Germany!! It's gonna be home to my G. for a whole year as he's going to university over there. G is phat like that. his little brother adores him

pretending to sleep

2011-08-15T22:16:00.000-07:00

la loca sad girl

oh my beautiful heartfull blogger from way across the pond

2011-08-15T09:43:00.000-07:00

wish we were right next door neighbors.. hanging out our gleaming white laundry (pillow cases and negligees) we'd have matching backyardy clotheslines, talking & talking and i'd give you a hug....Jakey and Pop-pops running about, the original Jake & Zoe at our feet....(i wish big)
we could drink a nice round goblet of wine and eat chocolate and i would totally comfort you.

2011-08-14T11:06:00.001-07:00

one of the main confessions i wanna make is that i got facebook confused with blogging

2011-08-14T11:05:00.000-07:00

and i need to get ahold of that..it's a Very confusing matter. also: major mindset Brain activity - i am totally immmersed (!) as a 9/11 Truth Seeker now. HELLO! google building 7!! how did i not know this shit after almost 10yrs..wtf? i cannot unring that bell. It's made me even more wide open in my mind to Other questions and awarenesses. But please.. nobody commit me to the looney bin, yet. So back to facebook. it's consuming and therapeutic. i'm a lonely single mother who lives towns now, from loved ones Facebook helps me not be so isolated...also there's the issue of: do i want peeps that read this blog (if any) to be my facebook friend?? is there something scary and possibly invitatious of cyber asking for it? because it sounds fun and harmless...retaining one's anonymous stature in the cyber spaces is nigh impossible...my babydaddy googled my name and found all kindsa weird stuff i do! which brings me to another catching up item: I, Changapeluda - am a Stage Actress again. High School Thespianism never really goes away!! i've been writing funny monologues and performing them at a little theatre by where i live! So Fun...i'm FUNNY!!
anywhoo just keepin' my promise to Blog More...told myself - "just fucken do it". oh yeah..please leave comments and let me know you're still out there.

i pledge allegiance to my tits of the united states of america!

2011-08-07T17:49:00.000-07:00

hello blogspot.. long time no see!

rental car @ avila beach

2011-08-07T17:47:00.000-07:00

I still love this blog after all these years!

2011-08-07T17:43:00.000-07:00

random shots of apartment living...it's lovely living in apartments in san luis obispo...i've been a busy girl! i promise to catch up soon and i don't promise Nothin' unless i mean it.

Now why in the fuck do i have to be hagridden by anxiety??!

2011-04-05T17:21:00.000-07:00

it sucks the biggest green donkey dick..Ever. When and what will make me stop, hmm? i am the maker of my own destiny, am i not?? just needed to get that Out my system so i can come back here, read this - and shake myself. thank you very much

This is Don Chingon/Mr. Demanding Bossypants

2011-03-26T14:55:00.000-07:00

after he bit a tomato and refused the peeled orange....ordering me to cut him some mango for his breakfast.

so i did... and he didn't like that either.

this is kinda like a dream bike of mine

2011-03-24T10:09:00.000-07:00

i been headblogging

2011-03-23T19:41:00.000-07:00

& not electronically doing the deeeed. Today i took a buncha devil may care WET vibrant love pix in the rainsoaked streets of San Luis Obispo..i feel the need to share them w/whosoever shall remain coming to this ghost-town blog of mine. so Kinderpop-pops goes half-day to a school 1.4 miles away from the apartment. rain or shine...on foot. i've got a few tricks up my sleeve when a five year old gets tired of walking...my main trick is bribery and 7/11 factors in quite a bit. we also do fun stuff like stash our vitamin water in weird squatty palm trees on the way there and pick it up on the way back.
why is this numbered?? strange things happen to blogger dashboard when you get outta the habit of sorta semi-regular sporadical blogging
hmph!

pix i took today

2011-03-23T18:52:00.000-07:00

G. had a senior recital that would/could and probably should knock your socks off

2011-03-19T21:35:00.000-07:00

angels have been following me (still)

2011-01-29T17:28:00.000-08:00

downtown today in a coffeeshop called Linnaea's that i've been frequenting since high school....i brought my angels along on a whim and drew in their chap books....i need to do stuff like this More Often.

Poe called it 'The Imp of Perversion'

2010-12-13T18:13:00.000-08:00

Walking to pick up Pop-pops from school, going thru a crosswalk dangerously close to a car speeding on up, i thought to myself that maybe i wouldn't mind so much - getting run over. At the train station waiting for my mother's train to arrive...Pop-pops and i were sitting on a big cement bench, maybe ten feet away from the approaching train....i was transfixed by the machinery under the train and entertained the idea of my body on the rails. i was secretly thrilled that there were no officials around to stop me.. My thoughts are getting darker & darker; seriously maudlin things. Maybe it's the season. I blatantly hate X-mas and admitted that out loud today. Sorry Jesus. It's beyond my usual avoidance.. The neighbors invited Pop-pops over to help decorate and i overheard the mom reading out all their names on the stockings. i was kinda grossed out by all the tinsel and blinky cheap decorations...we have no stockings, nor do i want to purchase any. My childhood christmas crap got pilfered during the eviction process and i now have no desire to be jolly or deck the halls or fake a belief in Santa.... maybe it's my shitty attitude about most things that's taken an even shittier turn for the worse. hmph

our thanksgiving Sucked/one more reason to hate the holidays/ it's turning into fucking Dancing with the motherfucking Wolves over here!

2010-11-27T13:34:00.000-08:00

Zoe got ran over by the neighbor lady who drives a big huge suv and pulls out too fast (another neighbor lady has Yelled at her for it) but it was a total accident/ these things happen. She died within minutes. I had to help her out from under the vehicle and she bit my arm pretty good.. That was when i knew she was out of her mind and wasn't going to make it. so i layed down with her and i got to comfort her as best as i could, tell her how i was sorry that this happened to her and she got to hear how very much i loved her, that she was the best pearly girl ever....my mind got shocked into protective mode and i didn't want my extra-sensitive kid (oh Pooor Poppity!) to see her like that so i rushed to yet another neighbor lady with cop/emt skillz, left Zoe with her while i put Pop-pops in a shower w/dishsoap and asked him to wash his bathtub animals until we situated Z. Her lungs were crushed. She was so brave and didn't even whimper, really. She died with her eyes open...just like how i wanna die so they can close one and it looks like i'm winkin' at the funeral that i don't even wanna have. I called the humane society to come and pick her up but it being thanksgiving they were closed. the same w/Friday - wouldn't be able to come until today, Saturday! so i was out of my mind thinking of building a papoose for her, haul her to the back or maybe bury her myself down the way i didn't know What to do ....so our maintenance guy got called (i didn't wanna call him and ruin his holiday) he came on his motorcycle and cleaned Zoe up, closed her eyes and covered her up to her neck w/a spiderman blanket she used to lay on in the kitchen...the maintenance man thought it was a good idea for a boy to say goodbye to his dog, which i dreaded my Pop-pops having to do (sooo hard to tell him our girl was dead)....the maintenance man also thought it was a good idea to put Zoe into a recycle garbage can for Three days and leave her in there, in plain sight - Right in the front yard until the Animal Control people came ....well, the neighbor ladies and i were all Fuck That and we made a few phone calls..now Zoe is buried out in the country on a friend's private property... She was the best girl The Best deetiest dote dote i could have ever had, i couldn't have asked for a more beautiful or watchful loyal friend.

Addendum:
i remember feeling manipulated and it was just tooo much that they killed Kevin Costner's dog in that movie.
and seriously is this something New this year that the Native American Indians were raped and pillaged by fucking pilgrims??!? how many enlightened articles on NPR (etc.)am i gonna have to read about that shit?!? too much to bear for this Changa. my head is about to break with my goddam heart. and guess what else? fuck me if it's not beginning to look a lot like Christmas.

2010-11-26T18:12:00.001-08:00

Que Viva La Zoe Pearl!!

2010-11-26T17:48:00.000-08:00

Que Viva! The Best most loyal friend, beautiful, sentient, funny, affectionate, greeter extraordinare, guardian, playmate, loneliness obliterator, most bitchen, helpful, bird snooty, gentle dog a girl like me was lucky enuf to have for over 13 years. i love you Zeezy, my pearliest girl, and i will miss you Greatly. You will always be in my heart.

2010-09-08T18:10:00.000-07:00

Pop-pops is a Kindergartner. and for the first few days he didn't like it one bit. said it was too HOT in there and that he wanted to go OUTSIDE but NOBODY would listen to him.which sucks if you think about it. he didn't want to go back.

oh loookit the first of hundreds of manilas! yay...

Nana was here visiting from Arkansas and she got to chauffeur him to his first day of school in puro style, aye....she sure did like that. and so did he, my schoolboy

i am one lucky son of a bitch!

2010-09-06T11:05:00.000-07:00

Somebody gimme a congratulatory kiss!

G.'s brain (power) is Ginourmous

2010-09-06T10:51:00.000-07:00

when i get to hang out with him (an incredibly sad amount)just being with him - listening to him

i'm all a'marvel

i may change Happy's name to Grace

2010-09-06T10:47:00.000-07:00

her first job as a waitress is teaching her So Much in the dealing with assholes department. she has a very pretty smile & she wouldn't let me Or her visiting nana pay for dinner

WILD Child

2010-09-06T10:33:00.000-07:00

because i Encourage this (shit!)

down to a dumpster dive camera that still captures things in a saturatious blip

2010-09-04T13:12:00.000-07:00

G. & Popperski (Pop-pops as a creepy little bank robber)

2010-09-04T13:06:00.000-07:00

my sons/the brothers in downtown San Fran

i can just feeeel a mad crime spree comin' on!

San Francisco made me wanna write better/more posts

2010-09-04T11:54:00.000-07:00

i told my biggest son, "remember when i used to write good [imho]posts?" i fondly reminisced those san franciscan bloggities and so became inspired.

8-9-10!

2010-08-09T12:48:00.000-07:00

is momentous fer me ( i hope whomever reads this makes it a commendable one for their own selves!)
Wooo Hoooo i am only transitionally homeless - & Technically they ask me to fill out my copious paper workingz as such because this apartment ain't Permanent housing so don't get too comfortable but that don't stop me from being grateful as all get-out....we got us a roof over our head; a place to park our tipi ( so to speak)

Aaahh just taking a shower in my own place feels soooo good. I've decorated the living room with doors from our Old house...which is a funky reminder but i'm okay with my recent past.

If i don't think about it tooo much...and as for as the perp in my life? the domestic violence culprit dumb fucker bitch knows where i live. his best friend's brother just moved in next door in a small small isolated world...moving three towns away doesn't make me anymore safe or rid of the asshole. but ya know what?
fuck him... i don't give him much energy At All, we focus instead on gettin' Up on our feeet already....for example Pop-pops is all into yoga now!

and the Best news of all i've had in a loooong time:
after going thru what we just went thru & coming out alive on the other side - i have an even finer appreciation for ART, my mother and my children and my sister, a normal bed, the funny, the fun and the good.

i'm just glad we are surviving homelessness & i now have a place i can walk around nekkid if i want

2010-08-02T18:20:00.000-07:00

in the most celiBRATory mooood, reckless happy, the kinda mood that makes me wanna flirt w/the inappropriate just for the hell of it, eat SIX sesame balls (oh my goooodsnakes they are delish when burnt just a lil tiny bit), kisss my kids all kinds and make loud fart sounds on my poppa tote tote's back and arms and neck (he's my only kid who'll let me), so grateful and relieved/feelin' Soooo fucking BLESSED that:

we have a place that's safe and Sound to lay our heads. Gracias a Tortilla Mary & the women's shelter of San Luis Obispo

2010-07-31T17:42:00.001-07:00

Four months ago i was a goddam hobo!

2010-07-31T17:40:00.000-07:00

and NOW

me & the kid (& Zoe Pearl) are livin' in some bitchen transitional apartments for the next 18 months if i'm good....hallelujah!

okay so now i'm learning the lyrics to Ave Maria

2010-03-29T10:50:00.000-07:00

Staying with my friend who teaches American Sign Language. Her house is very Rooomy/way Nice; she's the most hospitable chick with a big boisterous family that just goes on (happily & normally)about their familial business. Zoe the dog is relaxed for the first time in 6 months! Pop-pops is being all squished & squishy! Things are Good Again so i feel (when my friend who is letting us live w/her for a bit - omg when she totally signs a song called Hallelujah in Soprano WITH HER HANDS)...Poppity Pops, Zoe Pearl and i are in the presence of the most hopeful/comforting of angels, for real. It's very very Beautiful.

Sometimes my OUTLOOK is Unfocused

2010-03-25T10:41:00.000-07:00

mostly when i'm fucking Stressed & worried as all Hell about a roof over our head

..but then, when i happen to look Thru it? Instead of (all the time) @ it - aforementioned Outlook expanded homeless schmomeless state of affairs...

[pretty cool lookin']

Justa Keep on Keepin' On

2010-03-12T15:58:00.000-08:00

Fuck YOU, Homelessness!!! & you can KISS my ASS!!

2010-03-09T09:06:00.000-08:00

OH! this kid of mine! Thank you, Tortilla Mary

2010-03-08T12:18:00.000-08:00

for letting me be his mother. i Love him SO! from the top of his cowlicked head to the tips of his dancing dirty little bare feetz

amen.

Spilt Coffeeman

2010-03-07T21:13:00.000-08:00

knocked my mug over onto a paper plate and There he was! sometimes art is accidental embelished. that's how we roll around here, plus i keep spillin' my damn coffee!! travel mugs with no handles that are Tall and cylindrical are Not a good idea. but i do Love coffee....

The Bus! The busss the bus the bus the busss & how we still love it

2010-03-06T22:07:00.000-08:00

How YOU doooooinn??

2010-03-06T15:06:00.000-08:00

It's Saturday night, ya'll & this is where i am:
the more times i've rolled one of them goddam rolling suitcases like a vagrant...the higher my chin got! also: it helps when i picked out the slutty animal print suitcases....i've been dabbling in the self portraiture otra ves which is taking me longer to get the hang of. and i still highly recommend it. just to see where you're At.

ADDENDUM:

and this is why i'm still single (besides who in their right mind would date a homeless chick?)...so i been chattin' it up with this man on OkCupid - i know; my timing sucks, but honestly it's not like i'm gonna find Mr. Right on OKAY cupid...phffft! Mr. Right (for me) is like fucken Santa or the damn tooth fairy and doesn't even exist. Hello. Secondly: OKCupid is Stupid and Fun

and THREE: there are NOT that many cute guys on there! a lotta Hot women, though let me tell you. heh heh .... so i'm chattin' it up with this man who says he's a clinical psychologist only mmmm...maybe not. i Don't always believe what i read ( not anyMore). and he's a musician, too. i'm flirty enuf to ask what his favourite song to strum/play on his guitar (a Guild like i even know what that IS and he bought if from a carpenter) he names Bob Dylan as one of his inspirationz.. so i attempted to be all clever and use the lyrics to my favourite song of his (i actually only have the one CD of Dylan's about a train but that's neither here nor there)so anywhoo - i replied to his message with this

"BOB Dylan? hee hee. well i guess you gotta serve Somebody."

and he comes back with this:

"I don't serve anybody~!"

so i guess i offended him? a Dylan lover witha Dylan lyric. what the fuck is up with that??? he came back with an apology and somethin' about bein' 'fiery' about what he believes in as important...but i'm thinkin' - asshole.
also: not to be too persnickety and i reserve my right to judge the physical until i am Gagged out in person...he only has the one picture.. and in it: looks like David Hasselhoff. ew.

"...it may be the devil
or it may be The Lord
but you're gonna have to
serve somebody...."

You gotta have Hope!

2010-03-05T11:22:00.000-08:00

night time in the Gypsy Wagon. i like to think i'm a good cozymaker....

i bought this video on a whim plus it was only ninety cents. Bob Hope Bloopers! omg, i laughed so hard. Angie Dickenson is crazy sexy, don't you think??

while i'm not quite freeeee to say this: i might be learning to be @ home

2010-03-04T11:39:00.000-08:00

wherever the Fuck I Am! ha....and can feel the sun setting on a time of trial but i Don't wanna jinx myself

do i feeel as insecure as i sound cuz you don't know the half of it!

soundtrack to our days right now

1. i can see clearly now the rain is gone
2. everything is comin' our way
3. i got a brand new pair of rollerskates AND a tiger by the tail (it's plain ta see!)
4. take this job and shove it
5. baby got back/gimme one reason to stay here- mash up

& i saved the best for last:
#6 - Amazing Grace

i LIKE being easily pleased by the mundane (it organizes my jitters sometimes)

2010-03-03T11:33:00.000-08:00

I've been keeping a secret

2010-03-03T11:09:00.000-08:00

And it's a doooozey!!

2010-03-03T11:08:00.000-08:00

something i've been looking to come clean about for months now. i just figured out not two minutes ago that it's stunting my growth, aye. For real. everytime i think about writing almost anywhere i think: "oh fuck, i gotta write about That." i gotta get it out of my system so here it goes. at the baseline & i'm going to just blurt it out in all of it's ghetto gutwrench - my youngest's babydaddy thought it was a good idea to try to beat me Up at the storage unit. With our child strapped in his carseat in a front row seat, First he went to strangle me but i couldn't let Pop-pops see that happen so i curled away from him and ended up getting punched viciously in the back and side. As far as beatings go, i think my sister could have caused more damage -although it was still scary as hell for the loooose cannon aspect of it. his kid yelling at him to stop was what saved me. that and i called
9-1-1 - in Nipomo that means the sherriff and the highway patrol showed up. so we had to deal with the

po-po asking All Kindsa questions and him lying and saying he may have pushed me. after so much dishonesty w/the he said part of the he said she said i looked Up (ha!) and saw the storage units' surveillance camera pointed Directly at my mother's storage. i pointed it out to the nosy copper and told him the proof is in the pudding. they slapped the handcuffs on and Pop-pops saw his hero get arrested... it was like a Criminal Intent episode...i am now a member of the special victims unit. it sucks but it's also me bottoming out which involves me seeking sanctuary from so much more than Domestic Violence. In with this snow/shitballing; all this homeless BULLshit and crying too much about it... brought me to the Women's Shelter. Their legal department first because i have to now deal with scary shit like 3yr restraining orders against an Angry angry man...but Something very important happened at The Women's Shelter: The women that work there took us under their wings. Which has been an amazing grace. so fucking sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me. I tore that song out of an old piano book. I'm learning the 2nd verse by heart. Did you know the very last sentence to that second verse is this:

"And Grace shall lead me home"? it is. and this is the hour i first believe. Even though it's gotten this awful, just me getting it out of my head on here....is a big step. And i just took it.

moonshadows, angels keep following us even to the beach & i'll try not to keep going here

2010-02-02T10:13:00.000-08:00

on January 9th, 2010

i acknowledged/got mentally checkmarked as the first day we made it all the way through WITHOUT me crying. not even once.

There are places i'd love to GO

2010-02-02T09:46:00.000-08:00

the first one that popped into my head (so i'm gonna just gonna go with it) Memphis to see Al Green preach this time.
i'd love to go to Tepec, Mexico because they got some fantasmic cactus there... Arkansas to see my big sister & her mother and Mine of course but now it's her turn to be the goood daughter. i wanna be Bad (just like Michael Jackson minus the dead part & pervy white-out monkey cray cray) Brooklyn - to see an old theatre geeek college roommate. i'm always game to hit Big Sur on my way to San Francisco....

but there are some places i Do Not want to go.

i don't want to go back to the house where we used to all live. i hurt my own heart by mentally letting myself go there, even a little bit. and i sure as Hell don't wanna go back to the projects, neither! mostly - lately - i wanna go where we feel welcome; at home where there are no worries we'll be asked or want to leave. for the last six months i've been as nice as i know how to be, i've followed so many rules, tried to contain all of our rambunctiousnesses - as we slept on people's couches, rented out a room, now currently bartering a place to park our gypsywagon...i've been as fair as can be, even overly generous, i've worked my ass off to be of use. and still wherever we go,

we are not in a longterm fold, definitely temporary/transient reluctant short-timers.

My Life is Strange and Beautiful and HARD but i love the FUCK out of It

2010-01-26T09:38:00.000-08:00

G. came back to Nipomo for a smidge of his winter break; while it wasn't exactly what Any of us imagined/wanted or would have liked (it sucked), i made the most of it. This is the mantle in a granny house i'm re-newing in a barter for rent arrangement. Only we're just parking the gypsy wagon in the driveway. For the holidays i tried to jazz things up and pretty much failed. we are all, however, figuring out that it's a Good thing my kids love me no matter what.

Corn POP-pops Picker & i'd say this is More than double tasking!

2010-01-26T09:27:00.000-08:00

no matter how hard i want to believe/convince myself

2010-01-17T11:44:00.000-08:00

that technically we are Not homeless...i am still not at home.

so i romanticize it As Much as possible. for example, in any romantical situation the girl almost always gendertypingly weeeeps, right? and when i do....my hero, my night in shining armour, the little man known around here as Pop-pops - swoooops down, hugs me tight & tells me Not to cry..that he is a Superhero! that Loookit we have a home on Wheeeels that can go places....

2010-01-14T12:14:00.001-08:00

Today, in spite of everything: i feeeel like a Really Good Mother

2010-01-14T12:13:00.000-08:00

or maybe it's Because of everything. Sometimes it's my saving grace.

Motel numero seis & One of the perks of bein' without a proper home

2010-01-12T11:42:00.000-08:00

my hotel lovin' bug-a-booo and i stay at the motel 6 or any other cheap Inn we can find....for One nite, every once ina while.. - oh we get to sleeeep in a real bed, get a bucket of ice, take nice looooong showers, have ourselves an over-all delicious, transiently nutritious re-bootajuvinationz. Then as an added bonus i gain enuf strength in motel fortressed fortitude... allowing:
Changapeluda to somehow Re-Birth ourselves!

i just really like this picture

2010-01-11T20:24:00.000-08:00

i love all the people in it....i don't even know that chick by the men's bathroom but she's got a beret on and i love her, too! i love all the fooood, the money caught in this digital click. it makes me feel like a fat cat,

rich and sated. my mother and my two sons bring that out in me. i like to think we all bring it out in each other.

So if you're gonna be stranded

2010-01-11T12:14:00.000-08:00

because the bus system for Rural California stops working on the motherfucking weekends -

Shell Beach is the place to do it!

There's no place like

2010-01-08T01:54:00.001-08:00

there's no place like

2010-01-07T19:17:00.000-08:00

There's NO place like

2010-01-07T19:15:00.001-08:00

this beautiful daughter of mine

2010-01-06T13:04:00.000-08:00

is numerically an adult: yet will always remain to me; in my heart for always - my pretty baby queen. she's the ruby in my crown....and i love her so

Voila! My Lovely Banner made a re-appearing act!

2009-12-22T07:29:00.000-08:00

Thanks to the kind & lovely BohoGirl who arranged the artwork Before...i am taking this lovely combo of my favourite babydaddy's artwork, my desire to have Something as it was and BohoGirl's magical services as a visual prompt. May things stop goin' over like a turd in the punchbowl - so to speak and may Gooood things start happenin' around here!!

We get to Park back in Nipomo where it's sunny

2009-12-18T14:19:00.000-08:00

suddenly sometimes i feel like we be livin' in a higher tax bracket! my kid is so happy - eatin' watermelon in our motorbus as we contemplate mozyin' to the BEACH for Christmas

(this is what it was like) Livin' in the Projects

2009-12-17T11:37:00.000-08:00

where i learned two things: if there's a lock on your bedroom door, Lock it!
and it's a good idea when living in the projects to sleep with your purse.

Movin' the fuck ON

2009-12-17T11:16:00.001-08:00

& now we live in the 3rd Gypsy wagon down! so there

2009-12-17T11:07:00.001-08:00

Angels watch over my children

2009-12-11T23:00:00.000-08:00

more "camping"

2009-11-30T22:11:00.001-08:00

"Camping"

2009-11-28T14:57:00.000-08:00

being

2009-11-28T14:12:00.000-08:00

without a home is a lot harder than i thought it would be. With a four year old boy and a 12 year old dog; it's not as lonely as it could be. why i feel like i'm in this alone is my own personal problem, for sure. because it is totally not just me. happy isn't at home (hopefully yet) where she lives and my mother is Away from home. G. can't come Home - for x-mas time or any other..but mostly, at first - being without a home (only because homeless sounds sooo fucking pathetic)meant:
sitting outside
A Lot.

LUNCH!

2009-11-20T10:07:00.001-08:00

This one goes out to my sister Monica, who once had to be rushed to the emergency room because she jammed an olive pit up her nose sooo far, it had to be removed by professionalz.
Thank you, Monie for taking care of our mother because if it wasn't for you she'd have to live under the motherfucken Santa Maria Bridge. I love you, favourite sister of mine.

2009-11-10T12:22:00.000-08:00

So i had me a hankering

2009-11-10T12:05:00.000-08:00

Happy is using my old Pentax camera from high school! that is sentimentally all meaningful & shit!! We went to Avila Beach last friday, on my Mother's 72nd birthday (she's spending it w/my sister in Arkansas).
Here in Cali - A lovely sunsetting was had by all....
So i've had these pix uploaded and i wanted to gaze upon my babies on a monitor screen. i wanted to put them side by side..
I wanted to, so i did.
and now i'm reveling in the Fact that i can Do whatever the fuck i want.

HELLO again BlogWorld, here i am....

2009-11-09T13:05:00.000-08:00

and even though we're homeless (wtf?!?)

some things still remain the same:
We still Love the bus!, The Bus, THE BUS....

Happy still loves and uses her Polaroids

and G....well G. keeps himself aloft by his smarts and Power (as per usual)

and me?
Art is keeeeepin' me alive and well.....

and since being without a home is Messy as fuck and crazily so, i've come back to you, Dear Bloggers - to come clean and let it all hang out.....

you guys still wanna Hang Out with me????
LicketySplit Cleaning Service is alive and well and OPEN for business

taking a break from the batshit crazy job that is packin'

2009-05-24T12:12:00.000-07:00

because packing, to be honest - SUCKS the Big Greeen Donkey Dick, for sure! it's goddam Overwhelming me. So i'll stop for a little minute - to do something
Therapeutic and Fun

remember that Other Blog i started w/the hellish best of intentions to SELL my shit because i had just found out my brother & horrid sister-in-law fucked us over to buy their house so mortgaged out this one (established/completely Paid Off since 1943 omg!Nineteen Forty fucken Three!)- then as you know if you keep up with this twisty saga - wanted my mom and i to pay back their loan and/or sell it and consequently kick us out on the street???
Oh, i had me a Grand Scheme back then - so i set up this whole other blog called Lickety Split Rescue Aid Society....i love the play on words because it holds a way deeper meaning for me now...money is Not gonna come to my rescue! i'm Horrible w/money....giving my brother all the money i made by e-baying myself out? Was Not going to come to our rescue....But do you know what did come to the rescue, more importantly than financially but emotionally
Yep, it was art.
So i am hereby dedicating that blog - by posting my collection of Polaroids new & old. As an added poignant bonus; Polaroids are almost extinct! In a timely manner, Happy and i are hoarding film and celebrating something we will soon lose

which is the way we been rollin' around here....

In the wee small hours of the morning

2009-05-24T01:45:00.000-07:00

i'm tired but i can't sleep, i'm winding up a very packed day of packing, i'm sonsa/loopy from trying to decide what to put in the big ole boxes and What?! was i just doing??? where is the goddam packaging tape, i have toooo much weird art supply, we have too much junka junk to sort thru for one person and now i
can't think....

i mean: i can't think of a Better time to do my drawing thingamajigger!! woo hoo...okay - so i counted eight peeps....

that's a goodly amount, don't you think? 8 is great...and i got good ones, too... exactly the kindsa kind commentors w/just the right amount of coolness and variety. and now here we are together - havin' us a lil lickety split drawing party... i feel funkily festive about this whole chingadero...so!
the fabacious 8 are: (in the order that they appeared)
all of yous get put into a hat and VOILA!

aww man, i was gonna send one her way because she asked so nicely...i better pick out another one

awww man, what if they want to remain anonymous, i better pick out another one

awww man! this looks like it's rigged....
although i'm glad G. won. if he called me up and said he won some random wacky drawing from the blogosphere, i'd be stoked. It feels good to be a winner, even if this is a trifle silly...all in good fun - Congratulations & here are the results:
1st, 2nd and 3rd place winners:

my e-mail address is
zoegirlpearl@yahoo.com...shoot me your address to claim your prize.
Well folks,
this was exciting for an old gal like me, and now i'm all poooped out. Thanks for playing, those who did....i'm off to Bedfordshire.

In the last few minutes of it - I want to wish the only brother i ever wished i ever had

2009-05-22T23:55:00.000-07:00

This Lovely and Congratulatory Bowl of Beans

2009-05-22T23:29:00.000-07:00

goes out to my scholastic two: Happy will be ending her senior year @ Nipomo High School w/a 4.0 gpa & a coupla unexpected scholarships (five and SIX hundred dollahs
we never even ASKED for in this economy)my girl - she's just that clever w/her visual artistry. Go, Happy!
G. took his last final of his sophomore university year & he totally aced it. Musically enuf, it was the ear training final and my G. has beautiful ears.

Meanwhile, back in the jungles of Nipomo, Changapeluda wants to Seduce somebody into a mad crusade

2009-05-22T19:13:00.000-07:00

I want to seduce them into thinking i am way valuable and wildly intelligent. I want to seduce someone into going to the thrift store with me and spending the first hour on just the books. I want to seduce someone into driving me up north that really likes to travel down south. I want to seduce them into knowing i am the best kisser they have ever had. I want to seduce someone into keeping me around.

Then i want to cook them breakfast (something with honey & butter and lots of yummmm)
and then i want to seduce them some more. I want to seduce someone into thinking my art is magnificent to behold!
I want to seduce someone into carrying heavy things for me. I want to seduce someone into being on my side, no matter what. i want to seduce someone into helping me save my mother's legacy. I want to seduce someone into laying with me in a field of stone when the moon is full. I want to seduce someone into loving me forever~por vida....

Some of the Strange Yard Treasures i'm moving to the side of the house

2009-05-21T13:57:00.000-07:00

I save the weirdest shit. I can't help it. Oh well, at least i look like a big sturdy guy in this next picture!

and you know what? I am a big sturdy guy...a big sturdy guy you would totally ask to help you move. and who would be there. with bells on....
so Yeah, i also gotta move Zoe's house because Her's, (and my equity SUCKing brother's and his black hearted wet dogfart of a wife's house, too - don't forget) Did NOT GET FORECLOSED on! I am Movin' it on Outta here, La Casita de Zoe Pearl. only i don't even Know where....shit howdy this is the reality of it....jeez, where IS the nearest tent city?? I'm being very flippant, if you can't tell. That's just the kinda mood i'm in Plus, i got a place for us to stay. My cousin Little Josie said if worse comes to worse - i could stay with her. And Worse hasn't even come to worse, yet If at all....But mostly what i wanted to say (and show) with this post is that i am Strong...so strong that i could put that doghouse in the damn moving truck all by myself, if i had to. The roof is detachable.

ADDENDUM

2009-05-20T06:40:00.000-07:00

In a sweet ghetto twist: The least worse brother, who initiated all this trailer snatching drama? Can't even BE in San Luis Obispo County (according to his Probation Officer)he's restricted to Santa Barbara County....but just in case we bought a big ole lock for the trailer hitch!

Lickety Split Ass Kicking Service

2009-05-15T13:07:00.000-07:00

Dear Blogger,
This is one of those times i want to thank you sooo much for even existing. I have some VISCERAL shenanigans goin' on right now and am soo PISSED/Riled UP/scarin' poor Pop-pops with my bad self....I gotta get this out of my head! I gotta come clean about it right now because i already have tooo many things inside this damaged head of mine (i keep having to remind people that my father dropped an un-skyhooked NAILGUN on it and that's why i'm like this!! - read my archives if you don't believe me) So ANYWAY FUCK i'm so fucking pissed off right now! Pissed and confused and Reactionary (like a Nuclear Reaction) I'm so pissed i'm freaking out and i can't even call anybody about it right now
okay here lemme explain - i could fucking spit nails so this poor keyboard is gettin' a Beating...
. One of my brothers just called and told our mother that he and the other, worser (sorry but he is) brother AND that dumb fucker bitch cousin of mine that stole those 1928 rims from the yard and wouldn't bring them back until after i wrote that poisoned pen letter -Those 3 unfortunate souls are coming over tomorrow to pick up my dad's work trailer - like it belongs to them with all my dad's old tools ( a few of them aren't even broken!)And boxes of old videos and family photos and a few toys. They seem to think they can back up their truck and TAKE MORE from here. I am Sooo SICK of people thinking they can just come here and take whatever the hell they want. If it's valuable and antique they think they should Have it. I've been at the No MAS stage for at least the last 3 rounds. And at the point where i feel Dangerous and Want to Kick some ASS....And they think they can just waltz on over here and nobody is gonna say nothin' - those fuckers have another thing coming. Especially the brother that got us into this mess in the first fucking place. Oh, he's gonna Get It. OMG. I am FUMING! fuming and plotting and writing my monologue. Also, i will be wearing sturdy overalls and steel toed boots.