Saturday, November 27, 2010

our thanksgiving Sucked/one more reason to hate the holidays/ it's turning into fucking Dancing with the motherfucking Wolves over here!

 Zoe got ran over by the neighbor lady who drives a big huge suv and pulls out too fast (another neighbor lady has Yelled at her for it) but it was a total accident/ these things happen. She died within minutes. I had to help her out from under the vehicle and she bit my arm pretty good.. That was when i knew she was out of her mind and wasn't going to make it. so i layed down with her and i got to comfort her as best as i could, tell her how i was sorry that this happened to her and she got to hear how very much i loved her, that she was the best pearly girl mind got shocked into protective mode and i didn't want my extra-sensitive kid (oh Pooor Poppity!) to see her like that so i rushed to yet another neighbor lady with cop/emt skillz, left Zoe with her while i put Pop-pops in a shower w/dishsoap and asked him to wash his bathtub animals until we situated Z. Her lungs were crushed. She was so brave and didn't even whimper, really. She died with her eyes open...just like how i wanna die so they can close one and it looks like i'm winkin' at the funeral that i don't even wanna have. I called the humane society to come and pick her up but it being thanksgiving they were closed. the same w/Friday - wouldn't be able to come until today, Saturday! so i was out of my mind thinking of building a papoose for her, haul her to the back or maybe bury her myself down the way i didn't know What to do our maintenance guy got called (i didn't wanna call him and ruin his holiday) he came on his motorcycle and cleaned Zoe up, closed her eyes and covered her up to her neck w/a spiderman blanket she used to lay on in the kitchen...the maintenance man thought it was a good idea for a boy to say goodbye to his dog, which i dreaded my Pop-pops having to do (sooo hard to tell him our girl was dead)....the maintenance man also thought it was a good idea to put Zoe into a recycle garbage can for Three days and leave her in there, in plain sight - Right in the front yard until the Animal Control people came ....well, the neighbor ladies and i were all Fuck That and we made a few phone Zoe is buried out in the country on a friend's private property... She was the best girl The Best deetiest dote dote i could have ever had, i couldn't have asked for a more beautiful or watchful loyal friend.

 i remember feeling manipulated and it was just tooo much that they killed Kevin Costner's dog in that movie.
and seriously is this something New this year that the Native American Indians were raped and pillaged by fucking pilgrims??!? how many enlightened articles on NPR (etc.)am i gonna have to read about that shit?!? too much to bear for this Changa. my head is about to break with my goddam heart. and guess what else? fuck me if it's not beginning to look a lot like Christmas.  


Anonymous said...

oh man.... me an my Mr. Pearl are crying inside. I am sorry.

Heartful said...

I'm so sorry to hear that Zoe died, and how she died. Sending you & Pops big love x

Anonymous said...

My heart is so sad for you guys and for what she was in our lives too :(